Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Ten tips on becoming a successful business leader

CEOs and their golden parachutes have become a staple news in the last few years. There is that Yahoo musical chairs and the HP fiasco just to mention a few newsworthy items. And who can resist the urge to be inspired from all those government officials spending enormous amounts of tax payer's money? After being bombarded with news about these "successful" leaders and having learned from the best in my own professional career, I thought it was time for me to write one of those "Ten things you absolutely must do to woo the love of your life" style articles. So here it goes...

Demonstrate incompetency in doing real work - If you learn anything from this article, this is the one that you must really grasp. People who do real work may climb the ladder to fix a light bulb, but they never climb the one that makes you truly successful. You must actively demonstrate your inability to perform even the routine work items. That way everything gets delegated to the real workers and you have plenty of time to manage others and focus on your own career advancement.

Lying is just stretching the truth - If you think that tiger in the cereal commercial really exists, you might as well give up and try to become a mathematician or something. It's all about advertising and here in the US we are really good at it. You must learn to successfully stretch the truth about your resume (so what if you didn't really have that degree in metallurgical engineering?), the size of the company, the revenue, etc. That's the only way of getting to the next and even bigger level of stretching the truth.

Control the information flow - All communication between the lower and higher levels in your organization must go through you. That way you can convince the people that work for you how every bad decision was made by the superiors and tell your superiors how every failure was the fault of XYZ working for you and that s/he needs to be fired.

Align yourself with success - Many people believe in this myth that the success has to be "earned". They clearly haven't seen the Staples "Easy Button" ad. You have to be smart enough to judge what's getting successful and what's failing. When you see something failing, get hold of the smartest person who works for you and tell him (in private) how s/he is the only one who can save the situation. If something is on track to becoming successful, jump on it with both your feet and widely publicize how you are the key driving force behind it.

Keep up the appearances - Always remember that it is all about the "image" and perception is reality. No one really cares if you understand the business. That's such an ancient idea. Everyone is hoping that you will follow my tips listed earlier in this blog and con a bigger fish so that they can get a few more pennies in their pocket.

PS: I did originally set out to write 10 tips on becoming a successful business leader. Unfortunately I do have to get back and do some real work. But some times less is better. Good luck with your careers and do mention this blog post in your television interview after you get indicted by SEC.

2 comments:

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  2. These tips are helpful, not just for being successful but for career growth as well, thank you for sharing your thoughts. In order to grow it is important to discover and venture on new opportunities and expand one's zone, for example discovering international business opportunities and growing your business overseas. Thank you for sharing this.

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